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9/18/2024 12 songs to get to know you wrapped
I came up with the prompts for this 12 songs challenge to send to some friends because it seemed like a fun way to get to know them better and also I love / am addicted to making playlists. Always looking for new music. My spotify looks as bad as my email. Loved making mixtapes back when mixtapes were made and burned CDs scratched and strewn in car passenger seats with heavy marker labels and doodled impossible to read tracklists.
It's hard to have words to say what we mean and communicate sometimes, a lot of the time, all of the time? And giving someone songs that have moved you in some way, have lived with you, with the hope that someone might momentarily exist in the same space you have existed in, feels like a beautiful ritual we should continue to perform. To reach across the divide to say: I see you. Do you see me? Are we here together? I sent the prompts to a couple friends then had the idea to share them and catalogue them here on the blog. Truly grateful for everyone who spent time in their day to put theirs together and think about their life as soundtrack and send it in. On the way I've made some new brilliant friends. I've been turned on to a lot of music I didn't know before. I've tried to listen to every playlist from start to finish, on a walk or laying down, doing chores, and have enjoyed the ride of each, wondering about the lives lived accompanied by these sounds. I started making my own when I shared the prompts but it remained unfinished and has changed over the summer many times, obsessions passing and new ones taking hold, what I've been listening to lately, how to choose from all the awesome Gemini artists that have impacted me, what sort of wrestler I would want to be. Only finishing it yesterday, now in September and the weather finally starting to feel mildly mildly like fall. Listening through it a last time it seems pretty sad, end-of-something more than beginning-of-something, like a fall playlist. What comes first, the feeling or the song? But I think also hopeful? It would be cool to do this again and keep the project going. 12 songs to... 12 Songs by Kim Goransson
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Goodbye Horses" - Q Lazzarus 2. Artist I've seen live: "Maybe the People Would Be the Times or Between Clark and Hilldale" - Love 3. Zodiac sign: "Place To Be" - Nick Drake 4. Breaks my Heart: "Song To The Siren" - This Mortal Coil 5. Makes me dance: "Honey" - Robyn 6. 18 year old me: "La Mer" - Nine Inch Nails 7. Comfort: "Seventeen" - Sharon Van Etten 8. Wrestling theme: "I Hope" - Cranes 9. Music crush: "Horseshoe Crab" - Slothrust 10. Reminds me of a parent: "Höghus, Låghus, Dårhus" - Imperiet 11. Feels like summer: "Senegal Fast Food" - Amadou & Mariam, Manu Chao 12. Jukebox one-shot: "Freight Train" - Elizabeth Cotten
9/12/2024 Zine: When Can You See Me? by Niku RadanThis zine was made by Niku Radan and can be pre-ordered from her here.           
have you made a zine, new or old, and would like it featured on the blog?
submit it to [email protected] 8/29/2024 12 Songs by TC Pescatore
12 Songs by TC Pescatore
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Relapse" - Sister Wife Sex Strike 2. Artist I've seen live: "Tyler's Song" - Churches & Trains 3. Zodiac sign: "The Bill Collector's Theme Song" - Apes of the State 4. Breaks my Heart: "City of Black Fridays" - Mischief Brew 5. Makes me dance: "Fuck Shit Up" - Wingnut Dishwashers Union 6. 18 year old me: "Skulls" - The Misfits 7. Comfort: "Bottom of the World" - Tom Waits 8. Wrestling theme: "Old Dead Tree" - Defiance, Ohio 9. Music crush: "Severed Hand" - Local News Legend 10. Reminds me of my parents: "Landslide" - Fleetwood Mac 11. Feels like summer: "Swimming Ground" - The Meat Puppets 12. Jukebox one-shot: "How did I get out Alive?" - Mischief Brew
8/23/2024 12 Songs by Teresa Mestizo
12 Songs by Teresa Mestizo
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Inside Out" - Martin Dupont 2. Artist I've seen live: "Dusty Paths" - Martial Canterel 3. Zodiac sign: "A Boy (소년이여)" - G-Dragon 4. Breaks my Heart: "Eight Letters" - Paul Baribeau 5. Makes me dance: "Dance" - Giirls 6. 18 year old me: "I'm a Square" - Anorexia 7. Comfort: "Orpheus" - David Sylvian 8. Wrestling theme: "Human Pills" - Kap Bambino 9. Music crush: "Vampiro" - French Police 10. Reminds me of my parents: "The Green Man and the March of the Bungalows" - The Dancing Did 11. Feels like summer: "Fall Underneath" - Snakadakta 12. Jukebox one-shot: "A Gift of Tears" - Jeunesse d'Ivoire
8/13/2024 12 Songs by Samantha Slaven
12 Songs by Samantha Slaven
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Cruel Summer" - Taylor Swift 2. Artist I've seen live: "Runaway (2023)" - P!nk 3. Zodiac sign: "Crazy Kids" - Kesha 4. Breaks my Heart: "Lullaby" - American Murder Song 5. Makes me dance: "Shut Up and Dance" - Walk the Moon 6. 18 year old me: "Dance in the Dark" - Lady Gaga 7. Comfort: "Song for The Lonely" - Cher 8. Wrestling theme: "Daughters of Darkness" - Halestorm 9. Music crush: "Poison Poison" - Renee Rapp 10. Reminds me of my parents: "Mother’s Daughter" - Miley Cyrus 11. Feels like summer: "Summertime Sadness" - Lana Del Rey 12. Jukebox one-shot: "Last Call" - P!nk
8/9/2024 12 Songs By Kit McG
12 SONGS BY Kit McG
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Kiss Them For Me" - Siouxsie & the Banshees 2. Artist I've seen live: "Mockingbirds" - Grant Lee Buffalo 3. Zodiac sign: "Army of Me" - Bjork 4. Breaks my Heart: "Who Wants to Live Forever" - Queen 5. Makes me dance: "Got to Give it Up" - Marvin Gaye 6. 18 year old me: "The Crunge" - Led Zepplin 7. Comfort: "Snow" - Loreena McKennitt 8. Wrestling theme: "Firestarter" - Prodigy 9. Music crush: "All Summer Single" - Billy Idol 10. Reminds me of my dad: "William Tell Overature (Lone Ranger Theme)" - Hans Zimmer 11. Feels like summer: "Boys of Summer" - Don Henley 12. Jukebox one-shot: "Jesus Built My Hotrod" - Ministery
8/7/2024 The Weight of Love by John Delaney
8/7/2024 12 Songs by Jane-Rebecca Cannarella
12 SONGS BY Jane-Rebecca Cannarella
1. Listening to a lot lately:
"Donna" - Rubblebucket 2. Artist I've seen live: "Future is the Future" - Electric Six 3. Zodiac sign: "Causing a Commotion" - Madonna 4. Breaks my Heart: "Jesus, Etc." - Wilco 5. Makes me dance: "Pick Up the Phone" - Dragonette 6. 18 year old me: "Debaser" - The Pixies 7. Comfort: "The Long Island Sound" - Beirut 8. Wrestling theme: "Heaven is a Place on Earth" - Belinda Carlisle 9. Music crush: "The Recluse" - Cursive 10. Reminds me of my dad: "Moonshadow" - Cat Stevens 11. Feels like summer: "Fuego!" - Murder by Death 12. Jukebox one-shot: "Roam" - The B-52s
12 songs by J.C. Rodriguez
1. listening to a lot lately
"Trust Me” – Sincere Engineer 2. band I've seen live "The Sun” – Tigers Jaw 3. zodiac sign “Simple and Clean” – Utada 4. breaks my heart “Elephants” – Rachael Yamagata 5. makes me wanna dance “At the Speed of a Yellow Bullet” – Head Automatica 6. from/for 18-year old me “What Lies Between Your Skin and Your Bones” – Love, Robot 7. comfort song “Both Sides Now” – Joni Mitchell 8. wrestling entrance theme “Zero” – Vanna 9. my music crush “Lo Siento BB :/” – Tainy, Bad Bunny, Julieta Venegas 10. reminds me of my parents “Somebody” – Depeche Mode 11. feels like summer “Antidote” – Orion Sun 12. last song on the jukebox before I die “Sister” – Jawbreaker
Playlist for Commuting on the LIE
I’m turning 30 at the end of the year & about once a week I ask myself if I’m too old for sad subculture scenester shit & SURE I might be, but I defy anyone to tell me that emo (both as a loose genre & a general mood) doesn’t ABSOLUTELY slap during the summer. When it hits 85 degrees, give me a car with working AC, a three-beverage rotation, & some sad shit & we’re in fucking business. "Trust Me” – Sincere Engineer /// listening to a lot lately Kicking off this playlist with something I was put onto by one of my favorite people, Hard Times contributor Steve Yuen. He shared this music video on Facebook once & I think I commented “sounds like if Good Clean Fun was overproduced & suburban” after only listening to the first like 30 seconds. Since that original flippant snark, this has become one of my favorite pop punk songs by one of my favorite current pop punk bands. It captures everything that’s good about the genre, a sickeningly catchy clinic in yelping first-world misery over power chords. A song that points out all the simple pleasures in life & all the simple reasons we do not allow ourselves to them. "The Sun” – Tigers Jaw /// band I’ve seen live The summer after my first year of college, I met Ben Walsh (one of the guitarist-vocalists on this track) outside of Santos Party House (during the tour that everyone thought they’d break up after) & low key started crying (sorry Ben). Tigers Jaw is so important to me. It’s music that’s intricately whiny in a way that’s almost orchestral, from a band that’s made one of the most believable pivots from emo to indie rock. It’s clever sadness, delivered in an awkward manner that manages to never quite veer into cringe territory. This song is a thorough exploration of what makes that shit fun. A quick catchy intro about not being enough or compatible, a lengthy middle section that’s lyrically hopeful but sonically miserable, & an ending that seems to problematically reconcile the two. “Simple and Clean” – Utada /// zodiac sign Okay, four things. One, Filipinos don’t play about Utada. Two, Kingdom Hearts fans don’t play about Utada. Three, I’m a Filipino-American that used to be a moderator of a Kingdom Hearts role play message board. Four, we stan a non-binary Capricorn icon. I tried not to be basic. I tried to be ~mysterious~ & use a deep cut. I tried not to pick this song. I tried not to pick First Love, either. But no, it’s fucking Simple and Clean, man. I’d like to believe that somewhere in a parallel world, I perform as a drag queen under the name “Oooh Bae” & my best brunch number is to this song. I come out in a purple short-straight bob wig with bangs, a blindfold, & an Organization XIII cosplay robe. When the acoustic guitar comes in at 0:26, I remove the robe & blindfold to reveal a gothic maid outfit. At the “Don’t get me wrong, I love you / but does that mean I have to meet your father?” lyric, I situate myself between the age-gap bear couple & make provocative gestures, then go back to my routine. It’s slow, soulful, sensual. No gymnastics, minimal floor work. Just me pleading on my back & on my knees. Finally, once the “hold me….” climax hits at 3:25, I invite someone in the audience to bury their head into my smooth, shiny, shaved, moisturized, all-natural brown B-cup bosom. “Elephants” – Rachael Yamagata /// breaks my heart A prolific writer tweeted this song after their breakup with another prolific writer. It was during the COVID quarantine. I clicked the link, heard the song for the first time, & started sobbing. I was not going through a breakup, but my lolo had just died. Every night that summer, I listened to this song while smoking cigarettes on my parents’ porch. I don’t smoke anymore, but I still love this song, & my lolo is still dead. “At the Speed of a Yellow Bullet” – Head Automatica /// makes me wanna dance Terrible transition, I know, but do we not deserve some levity from grief? I can count on one hand all the times I’ve danced, let alone wanted to. I’m not particularly proud of this fact, it’s just the way I am. For example, near the end of my cousin’s wedding reception, she got absolutely blitzed & found me at the corner of the dance floor bobbing my head. She was screaming “J.C.! This is my wedding! I paid a lot of money for this shit! You better start fucking dancing!” The last time I actually danced was probably 2012. I was 17. My coworker at Hot Topic was throwing a Halloween party at her house. Our assistant manager drove me & my best friend over. I think on the way there, they decided to start a band that would end up just sounding like Fall Out Boy. The host’s ex’s brother (I think?) was mixing drinks. He hesitated before handing it to me. He was like “are you sure you’re old enough?” & I was like “bro, I literally just did coke with some guy in the bathroom, who the fuck cares?” which made him laugh. From what I can remember, the party was a vibe. It was a wild assortment of goths, cholo-wannabees, borderline incel gamers, new Long Island moms, & scene kid rejects. When this track came out everyone sang along & danced. Something about dance-punk really brings people together, I guess. Also, the host showed me how to download League of Legends to a Mac that night. I think she’s a Twitch streamer now. That’s pretty cool. “What Lies Between Your Skin and Your Bones” – Love, Robot /// from 18 year old me Aight, history lesson SLASH opportunity for me to get real fucking nerdy about some regional music scene shit. Long Island might be having a glorious renaissance & return to form with melodic hardcore bands like Private Mind, HEAVYHEX, Stand Still, Inside, & Crime In Stereo now BUT there was a stretch where basically all our local shows were for shitty EDM metalcore hybrids & All Time Low clones. Love, Robot’s first album came out when that situation was most dire & it offered local Tumblr users a break from all that. Half the band had just quit, including their original singer, & they had just come off a very poppy EP that some fans were not fucking with. The four members left in the dust created something just as catchy, but darker, more aggressive, & with a campy edge. At the risk of sounding reductive, imagine early Paramore with sapphic lyrics & screaming. Y’know how like you can just tell from her singing that Haylee Williams was a southern gospel singer as a kid? Well, you can tell from listening that Love, Robot’s vocalists definitely grew up on Long Island. Breaking this down to its loveliest skeleton was tight percussion by Anthony Rega. Rega, who had just come in from Azariah (a neighboring post-hardcore darling at the time), reinforced a sound of 75% harmony & 25% discord from Love Robot’s veteran members. Punchy baselines & echoing growls from Tyler Schwab offered muscle. The flesh, allowed to finally form by the duo of guitarist-vocalists Alexa San Roman & Sean Murphy. They switched off expertly & circumstantially between atmospheric post-rock, twangy emo, & chuggy hardcore riffs – always being sure to complement each other. Vocally, they gave us a sparring match. San Roman’s soulful, desperate pleas up against Murphy’s raw, sometimes sinister sounding, actualizations, a sonic medium for a lyrical journey of heartbreak, transition, grief, & reluctant, unfortunate self-acceptance. & when I was 18, this was my bible for how to grow, knowing that the future me would discover new flaws anyway. A blueprint for evolving emotionally & aesthetically in a way that acknowledges the past & an introductory meditation on just being a fucking person. Thanks Love, Robot <3 “Both Sides Now” – Joni Mitchell /// comfort song Specifically, the 2000 re-recording, where her voice was all raspy from the drinking & the smoking & the life living. I know by this point I’ve probably established myself & my taste as this ungracefully aging Hot Topic employee, but I shit you not, this is actually my favorite song of all time. First & forever imprinted onto my brain from Love Actually, which is also my favorite movie of all time. I think I was 8 when I first saw it, which was probably too young but whatever. This song plays when Emma Thompson’s character realizes on Christmas that her husband, played by Alan Rickman, is cheating on her (or at least intends to, probably). It’s haunting, she listens to the song on a CD gifted to her by said husband, weeps in the corner of the bed they share, & then collects herself to put on appearances for her children in the living room. It’s a scene that has only gotten more poignant as I’ve gotten older, but I want you to understand how I saw this at 8 years old: Hilary Clinton was crying because Professor Snape was totally gonna cheat on her with one of the doctors from Resident Evil. “Zero” – Vanna /// wrestling entrance theme This is a cover of the Smashing Pumpkins joint. My mom always had K-Rock on when I was a kid, so I’m pretty sure I’ve been listening to Smashing Pumpkins my whole life. My dad, while musically a fan, was an outspoken hater of Billy Corrigan as a person. Spoiler alert, my dad was right. That said, I’m pretty sure I liked every Smashing Pumpkins single except this one, & Vanna was one of my formative post-hardcore bands. I saw Davey Muise (singer of Vanna) play a solo show like halfway through the Trump presidency & he went on this segue about how borders are bad because his wife is a Canadian immigrant & also that we should all love caramel people. I, as the only brown person in that 100-cap venue yelled out, “caramel people love you too!” “Lo Siento BB :/” – Tainy, Bad Bunny, Julieta Venegas /// my music crush When Benito first came onto the scene, I finally understood adult Swifties. I am, quite literally, obsessed with everything this man does. From getting put through a table in WWE, to trying to act, to promoting Latin American trans musicians, I just love him. I put on his music in the car to remind myself (& certain neighborhoods) that I am, indeed (or at least partially) Latino. Add Tainy & Julieta Venegas, & that is simply too many beautiful people on one track. “Somebody” – Depeche Mode /// reminds me of my parents My parents have two love songs they consider theirs. This is the one in English. When I think about my parents, I think about how they’re the only functional adult couple I know. My mom attributes this to an active sex life & the liberating knowledge that you can walk away at any time, but I think there’s another part of the answer somewhere in these lyrics. “Antidote” – Orion Sun /// feels like summer It was six months after my first adult break-up & the first truly sunny day of the year. I had texted my ex because they had my dead uncle’s jacket & I wanted to get it back. They were agreeable to meeting. He was actually my tita’s ex-husband-turned-boyfriend-again, but I called him my uncle. He invited me to live with him when I got into college & died right before I moved in. I loved the guy & he had this old denim Marlboro jacket from when people would mail back cigarette packs like Box Tops. I drove from Queens to the North Fork to get it back. This song was playing on repeat. We met up on some small beach, made out almost instantly, got lunch, & made plans to spend the next weekend together. I went back to the city to hang out with my friends. Our group wound up in Koreatown & got really drunk. My friend Debbie (who is about a third my size) dragged me out to the street corner & told me I was making a mistake. Debbie is the most sensible person I know. I did not listen to Debbie. I spent the summer with my ex & we listened to this song in the car often. Then fall came & we broke up again in a Golden Krust parking lot, & Debbie, as always, was right. “Sister” – Jawbreaker /// last song on the jukebox before I die One night during that same summer, I drove my sister to that same Golden Krust. She was probably like 10 or something. She had just finished up at an evening orchestra thing & my parents were too tired to figure out dinner (she was a fairly particular eater at this time). I threw out curry patties as a suggestion & she got super excited. On the drive, she told me all about Gacha Life chibi anime edits and the Sanders Sides YouTube series. Two things I had zero cultural context for, but she explained them to me in a way I fully understood what both of those things were, & why they appealed to her, in like 10 minutes. I started crying by the end of the conversation. There was something mystical about realizing that this child I’d looked after & helped raise was developing her own tastes. Like it was the first step in a journey for an interesting life of pursuing interesting interests. Spotify:
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